The daydreaming continues...

I keep having to remind myself of the ripple effects of my work here. So often I wish I were there--but there is purpose in sitting behind my desk endlessly writing away. I just need to keep telling myself that.

Well, I sat down a few nights ago and typed out the most honest message I could to both my supervisors letting them know that I feel the Lord is and has been pursuing me to return back to South Africa and acknowledging that we need to work towards that. I do feel they will want me in the US a bit longer, so will wait to hear from them.

I forgot to mention I had a run-in meeting last week with Dr. George Ayittey an Ghanain economist who is widely-recognized Worldwide for his voice on what solutions for Africa look like. He is the author of Africa Unchained, a book that was really helpful to me. He affirms African solutions for African problems which I could not agree with more. Usually I am shy around these sorts of people, but seriously only through the grace of God who gave me great boldness, did I march myself right up to him, tell him what some of my ideas were, and ask if I could have his contact information so I could bounce some ideas off him and potentially sometime down the road ask him to be a board member :) That's exactly what I did and so I will contact him and keep the discussion going.

In the meantime, I need to start getting my ideas down concretely on paper. I have passions to work with youth doing fitness and nutrition programs, and character-building sports conferences/camps that will also serve as discipleship mechanisms and HIV prevention tools. This stems out of my love for running and doing triathlons and a run-in with an IRONMAN triathlete from one of the townships in South Africa in 2008.

Then there is also a dream to work with communities building skills and trading systems. I think they would be a bit similar to Millennium Villages but without the dependence on outside aid. God has pointed me to Zimbabwe with this vision long ago, so one step at a time I will get there, as long as I keep walking that out. I think my time with Farming God's Way, short as it was in 2008, will be a key part of this work. I just have a feeling that that relationship was cultivated for a larger purpose.

So, those are some of the dreams God planted in me--years ago. Sometimes I feel like they are impossible to carry out, but I believe God put them in me and that He has given me a love for Africa that will keep me focused even while I am away. That certainly has been the case so far. And I'm thankful He will do exactly as He desires to accomplish if I remain an open vessel for Him to move through. These dreams are not mine, but His, and I have finally reached the point of being broken of myself and poured out for Him. I'm beginning to grasp that I will be in Africa for a long, long time. Its just something I feel at the core of my soul. I know I still have a choice and there is plenty I could involve myself in here in the States, and God would love me the same. His love doesn't change no matter what we do or don't do. It is constant and cannot be earned. But there is a joy in me to keep walking out the vision He put in my heart...whatever that means...So step by step it is. My prayer is Paul's prayer that I would become less that He may become more and that in my temporary life He may be glorified and use me as He so desires.